Church Work Demands Mad People Skills

There are times in every job when you want out, want to try something new, want to get away from doing the same thing everyday. I’ve been a pastor for thirty years. Every other hour I want to do something else. But what? And how? Because regardless of my level of education or the skills I’ve developed, people consider what I do to be just “church work.” So, for all you pastors out there who would like to do something different with your life, and for all of you employers out there who think we have little to offer, here is a list of 10 things we can do better than the average Joe.

 1. Communicate with people. Pastors have to be able to speak, write, organize, advertise, inspire and sell their product, and let me tell you, it is not an easy sell. We are gifted in simplifying complex ideas and making them palatable to the general public.

 2. Conflict resolution. Any pastor worth his salt has discovered that a excessive amount of his or her time is spent helping people get along. Where else do mature adults threaten to leave an organization because the carpet color is changing?

 3. Marriage counseling. 6 sessions per couple. 1.5 hours per session. $0. And we are good at it. Most of us could open offices and just do counseling except for one thing, we’ve never made enough money to afford opening an office.

 4. Spotting talent. You try running an organization that has children’s programming, youth programming, adult programming, education for all ages, struggling finances, property management, custodial needs, arts programming and puts on a weekly show, based on using volunteers. If you don’t have an eye for talent, you don’t last long.

 5. Fund-raising. It cost money to run a church. People have to just give it to you. There is no product to buy. They get mad, they quit giving. Everybody considers themselves your boss because they drop a few bucks in the offering plate. Church is like New York. If you can make it there, you can make it anywhere.

 6. Travel planning. Youth group is taking a trip to Mexico and you have to keep the cost under $200 a student. The old, old people want to go to a country-western shindig dinner theatre and you need van drivers who won’t fall asleep at the wheel on the way home. Pastoral staff of 11 is mandated to go on a retreat, then given $500 to make that happen. Sound impossible? Not to super pastors.

 7. Human resources. See number 4. Add management, a touch of semi-annual evaluation, and requiring a 5-year plan and you have a one person HR department.

 8. Vision casting and development. Churches that don’t embrace change die. Pastors who don’t cast a vision find themselves leading churches that don’t embrace change. You see the need.

 9. Grief counseling. People in your church die. You do the funeral. And the counseling. You are often the first person called. You sit for hours just to provide comfort. Your presence alone helps people feel better. That’s a hell of a skill.

 10. Van repair. Who else is going to do it?

 The list could be longer, but then it sounds like I am bragging. Listen up employers who offer decent salaries. If you want to find an honest employee who will work hard for you, who carries a bag of skills necessary in today’s workplace, who will bring more to your table than any Hooters waitress ever could, hire us. Please. We need the money.